Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
