Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
