dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize