You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Randomize
