I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
