the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
