Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
