Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
