did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
