I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
tequila makes me forget i have legs
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
