I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize