You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize
