Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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