Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
