I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
