I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
