i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
and she was petting her beer can
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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