My underwear smells like fireworks.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
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