you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
