just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
