we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
