I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
i need some magic done to my vagina
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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