Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she smelled like a LAN party
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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