Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize