I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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