Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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