Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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