Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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