after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
