Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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