ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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