My friends, they love my intelligence
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
