Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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