The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
