Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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