Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
