when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
