No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
