ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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