our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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