Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize