Buhtt sex?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
