Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
