U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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