Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Randomize