You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize