White coat. Heels.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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