Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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