I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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