i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
